It's not just me who has sublimated Luddite feelings (or so my shrink tells me anyway). YOU have them too. According to a report by Kelton Research, we are all suffering from something they identify as "Cyberstress." This is how PR Newswire reports on the Kelton report:
-- The average consumer has experienced computer troubles eight times - bout every four months - over the last three years. -- The average American is wasting 12 hours per month - the equivalent of half a weekend - due to problems with their home computer. -- A majority of Americans (52%) describe their most recent experience with a computer problem as one of anger, sadness or alienation.
So over 50% of us describe our relationship with our significant digital other as being one of anger, sadness and alienation. Oh dear. It sounds like a complex French movie. I wonder how this breaks down in terms of Mac versus PC users.
One answer is DIVORCE. There are at least fifty ways to leave your digital lover. Just think what you could do with that extra half-a-weekend per month gained through accidently-on-purpose hurling your laptop out of the tallest building in town.
But wait. The solution might not need to so radical, so nihilistic, so Luddite. As it happens, the Kelton study was sponsored by SupportSoft who have just launched Support.com -- a service which provides something called "Instant Technology Relief". Here is Dr Robi Ludwig, host of TLC's reality series "One Week to Save a Marriage", on the value of Support.com:
"As computers become increasingly pervasive in our lives, our relationships with them can begin to seem almost as important as a relationship with a significant other. When problems then occur with the computer, it often leaves people feeling frustrated or helpless. On my show, I teach couples that they don't have to be an expert in resolving tough marital problems, they simply have to know whom to turn to for support. With the introduction of support.com, consumers can have a trusted advisor to turn to for technology relief when they experience frustrating technology problems."
So if YOU are feeling sad, angry or alienated by your computer, don't fret, don't feel guilty, don't become alienated from your signiificant cyber other. Go to the bullpen for technology relief. It's digital Rolaids time.